Oh, This is Good
February 6th, 2007
Reverend Ted Haggard, the disgraced Evangelical minister who was outed by a male prostitute, has been pronunced “completely hetereosexual” after a few weeks of intensive counseling.
Kind of like how I don’t eat sugar anymore, except for every chance I get.
And I’ve been declared “completely normal” by my therapist.
I’m picturing the investigation they mounted to make sure that the one prostitute was Haggard’s only extra-marital activity… I’m sure it was very thorough. I’m imagining 3 evangelicals in sport coats walking into a place like Pecs or Flicks… awesome.
Completely heterosexual? If I call myself a Democrat but have voted Republican a few times, does that make me completely a Democrat? No. It makes me an asshole.
Like this guy. America is so gross.